Work

There are days when I really can't stand my job. Don't roll your eyes at me, I know you go through the same feeling. I wanted to point that out briefly because when I do start feeling that way I remember the times when I didn't have a job or money. The desperate and scary times; like while I make rent, or can I afford food? Those times teach you how to never take work for granted, even when it sometimes frustrates or stresses you.


I was pretty lucky work wise initially; less than two weeks after my high school graduation is was in the Air Force. They housed, clothed, fed, and paid me! When I lived in the dorms I didn't ever pay for rent, or utilities, just food. When I was in base housing I paid rent but it was taken from my housing allowance so I never saw it come out of my paycheck because it didn't. Sure I couldn't call in sick to work or take a day off whenever I wanted but hell, I got paid for 30 days of vacation a year and at one point in time was working 4 days on, 4 days off! Plus the Air Force even gave me trips to help me save extra money! Two deployments, meant no place to spend my money and it just sat in my account waiting until I got home! Oh, did I mention those were tax free zones too? And do you think I saved any of it? Not really, a bit here and there but nothing like what I could and should have done.


Fast forward to when I got out, after I initially got down here I had a job with a temp agency that a military buddy set me up with. Eventually just as the name suggests, the temp job ended. Now I had no job; I wasn't very well versed in how to do resumes or even look for career type jobs. At one point I was turned down from McDonalds because I had too much experience, and turned away from Jack in the Box because I didn't have enough experience! Talk about mixed signals! I began to get panicky, my pitiful savings was pretty much dead and I didn't have any options. Finally I got a call from Home Depot about a cashiering job. I was so excited, never mind that it was only part time and a job that usually high school students not 25 year olds do. In my head it was a job, I didn't care if it was "lower" than what I was used to; it was simply an opportunity to not go homeless or hungry!


Later when I was working at my current job, I hit a beautiful manic phase. In a bad twist in timing I began receiving credit card offers right as the mania unfolded. I was suddenly able to magically buy whatever I wanted without paying for it! $600 engraved watch? Whole new wardrobe? Different car!? I could buy them all! Nothing stopped me until I racked up a crapload of credit debt, and creditors can be quite demanding; they actually wanted me to pay for the things I bought with their money! What jerks! Well because of the ensuing money chaos and the normal craziness that happens when the brain snaps from too much mania, I ended up slightly homeless. Once I was released from the hospital, I was really splitting my time between two different friend's houses. One that was close to where I worked and the other that was farther away but it was quieter and more rural so my brain could recollect itself.


Each time was a scary reminder that a job, any job is a hell of lot better than what many people have. They were brutal wake up calls that what you have financially should be wisely dealt with and smartly spent. But I think the most beautiful thing I learned is that those who are considered "needy" or destitute could be me or you at anytime. Beautiful might not be the right word to you, but it is to me because that simple realization can show us that we are all the same. No one is better or higher up, we are all at different points in our journey and we need each other to complete it. Some of us may be doing better financially but be destitute in relationships, family, or happiness. So this holiday season, maybe remember even if things are difficult, you are just as beautifully needed on this earth as every other person!